You find yourself kissing your unattractive boss, or even you more grotesque a family member. In another dream you are in bed with a colleague who you had not really noticed before, or you are engaged in sex that you categorize as bad or pathological.
How should we understand dreams of a sexual nature? Do we have to interpret the dreams literally? These dreams are common, and everybody has erotic dreams from time to time.

For starters, in some cases there is of course the literal meaning. You just want to snuggle with this person. However in some cases that doesn’t really make a lot of sense, such as making out with your unattractive boss or with a family member. It is also not that we secretly want to have sex with the boss or family member.

Something else is going on, but what might the dreaming psyche try to achieve? Initially our repulsion might block us from exploring the dream. We should remember that as a rule of thumb we can assume that our ego position is often wrong in the dream, so it would be wise to set aside our judgment for a minute to search for the medicine.

In these cases we should look at the symbolic meaning of the dream. To have sex would be to integrate, connect with, become one with, and love a certain aspect, quality, character trait or energy. For example in the dream above about the boss, let’s say that he is very detail oriented, precise, orderly and that I, the dreamer, lack those qualities. Perhaps the dream indicates that I am in the process of, or should integrate and develop those qualities within me. So, when we have a sexual dream about someone we should ask the question; what are the qualities that I associate with this person and then see if I might benefit from the integration of those qualities.

Another possibility is that you dream about someone in a very positive way, who you had not noticed before. Perhaps there is something to this person for you to explore in the outer life.

And then at last, there could be instances that we are out of touch with our natural sexual instinct, we overly judge it and it gets repressed. Then sexuality might turn its darker face and it shows up in eccentric ways. We might have to take a look at how we view sex and make some changes there.

Dreams about sex are natural and always point to something of tremendous value for our life. Don’t be embarrassed, but try to explore the meaning and play with the given suggestion to work with these type of dreams.

 

Would you want to work on a dream where you are puzzled about the sexual nature of it, then contact Machiel Klerk, LMFT
Machiel Klerk – Jungian oriented Mental Health Therapist with a private practice in Salt Lake City and founding president of the Jung Society of Utah.
www.machielklerk.com
For comments, questions or to make an appointment send an email to machielklerk@hotmail.com

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